I’m not a dog with an ego, even though I think I’m one of the best dog authors around.
I spend hours every day under my bush, deep in thought and contemplation, working on my ideas and stories. Then I blast my thought-particles into Laura’s brain, because her brain can take the power without exploding. She’s in the fourth grade.
(Any adult human brain would explode from the power of my thoughts because adult human brains are set in concrete. You can’t train an adult human. Every dog knows this. That’s why I chose Laura, who is a little girl, to receive my thought-particles.)
By the way, I call her Laoorel because it sounds better.
So, I transmit my thoughts every day. Laoorel writes them in her notebooks and then she gives these notebooks to her human dad. He makes books out of my wisdom so people all over the world can benefit.
NOW there is a new page on Amazon that lists HIM as the “author.” Like I said, I am not an ego-driven dog, but I want to be sure that he remembers where the inspiration, the thoughts, the wisdom, the hard work, and all the stories come from.
They come from me, Perdita Whacknoodle. Laoorel is my human translator, and her father is only the facilitator. ONLY the helper.
Author page? Shouldn’t that be ME, Perdita? Here it is, with HIS picture on it. See what you think.
I hope he doesn’t get conceited because Amazon calls him the “author.”
Because I, Perdita, did all the heavy lifting and hard thinking. Just remember that when you read my books. It might have come THROUGH a human, but the wisdom came FROM a dog.
You’re going to have to watch him there, Perdita. My human is an adult, but weird enough to cope.. just remember you want the royalties paid in tennis balls and bones.
Love,
Ani
Hi, Ani,
VERY good point. I’ll watch him, and I like the concept of a more useful royalty structure. I think we’re way ahead of the New York publishers on this, but if they hear about it, they may renegotiate with some of their authors. Brilliant idea!
Perdita Whacknoodle
An excellent post, Perdita. I’m sure Dad will give you credit, though he does have an exceptional author page. Mom